Sunday, November 24, 2013

Diablo Valley Railroad - Model Trains and Miniatures

The Walnut Creek Model Railroad Society has opened its doors to the public, this weekend and next (otherwise open most Friday evenings throughout the year while members work on the line) and is a good experience for all ages. I've written about this permanently housed model railroad before, so this is mostly a photo post. I am such a sucker for a finely detailed miniature world. And this HO scale railroad line is teeny-tiny and very detailed.

First, the layout. I don't have the most advanced of digital cameras, so my flash tends to blow out foregrounds on wide shots in dark spaces (what a fascinating sentence to draw you in). Anyway, this is just to give you an idea of the space. You circle around the building to see the entire layout (4,300 feet of track) and at one point enter a tunnel-like hallway (where little trains tunnel along the wall with you). The other side of the building has a Jurassic Park diorama and a model of the only "real" place represented, featuring a miniature of the only electric train ferry to exist in the U.S., once based in nearby Pittsburg, California.

Guys up in the mezzanine running the show, like model train Gods.




I was really drawn to the teeny-tiny circus with working Ferris wheel and carousel. I think they've added more circus-parade train cars this year.


Feel free to use this close-up of "The Largest Blood-Sweating Hippopotamus" as your Google+ profile banner. I'm putting it out there in the public domain.


Yay! Going to the tiny circus!




Tiny sideshow!
Tiny elephants!

Every half-hour on the hour, the overhead lights slowly dim until it's "nighttime" on the set. Lights come up in all the tiny railroad towns and lightning and thunder effects start happening. Then it rains on you—for real. Water pipes overhead drop rain down. It really surprised me, especially when it landed on my camera. The circus looks like this at night:


Hey, let's go to town.


Town during the day.


Town at night. The Olympic Theater marquee advertises My Little Chickadee, starring Mae West and W.C. Fields. My kind of town.


I noticed a little building off the beaten path during the night sequence. All its windows were lit red. Is that what I think it is?, I thought. Come the daylight a few minutes later, I had my answer.


Yes, it's a tiny whorehouse—The Scarlet Slipper. And it looks to be a popular destination for tiny-town dwellers, even though it's tucked away outside town limits, and there's no visible road leading to it. Hey, every little western town had at least one, and more likely half-a-dozen of these. Don't kid yourselves.


Turn away, children!

Where are more family-friendly environs? How about Jurassic Park for camping, fishing and hiking aplenty.


Another great potential Google+ banner from me to you. Happy holidays.


Stay on the path, Timmy.



Train guys behind (and underneath) the scenes, doing their engineering.


I think the railroad baron lives in this tiny castle. Either that, or a tiny vampire.


Tuesday, November 19, 2013

San Francisco's early-80s bands for inspiration

I just finished a big collaborative creative-writing project with my friend, who I met in the early 80s. What did we write about? The early 80s! Particularly the early 80s in San Francisco. If you weren't living there at that juncture in time, I can't do it justice in this little post here. It was a Whole Other World, I assure you.

I needed a lot of musical inspiration to write this thing, and since the 80s were a ripe musical time in the City by the Bay (remember Journey?—they were HUGE), I had much to choose from. This was when musicians (who weren't in Journey) could afford to live in San Francisco—crazy times!

The Mutants - Opposite World. The Mutants were such a special band of weirdos that they actually wore paper bags on their heads for this MTV video and for entertainment value, lit them on fire. Occasionally they do a reunion show and you should go. So should I. I saw them once on New Year's Eve as a youth and I swear they genuinely were mutating on the stage. I can't imagine what could have caused that.




New Drug. Punk-new-wave-sardonic-dance music.




Twisted Thing - San Francisco had its share of improv actors and comedians who seamlessly blended within the musical world, making for rich musical theater.




Insect Lounge - with the late Dirk Dirksen at the On Broadway, in the ancient year of 1984. This is a typical Mutants show, just so you know.




Let's move on to The Black Athletes—skate punks who would show up (or not, you never knew) and play an all-punk or all-ska/reggae show. It was random, like winning a lottery. They were a very tight band, a very mysterious band—evocative. And they rarely recorded anything. There's a cassette floating around with a bunch of their songs. I might try to archive that on the Internet somehow. I'll need my helpers and will get back to you on that. Die Laughing is very Fugazi-like.




The Residents - One-Minute Movies, from "The Commercial Album," featuring the late Snakefinger on guitar. These videos were on MTV occasionally—for real. Great low-budget creative weirdness. You can totally see how Journey came out of this.



Man's World  - Residents' song covers were...something else.




There can be no creative-writing project about early-80s San Francisco without Flipper's Ha Ha Ha. That's just how it is.



Sex Bomb - The one and only Flipper show I attended (at the Mab in North Beach) was so fraught with tension, angst, and God knows what chemical substances, that one band member walked offstage as the show began, leaving the band to recruit someone from the audience. They got a guy in the mosh pit to play guitar on Sex Bomb, and jammed on that riff for 30 minutes. They then left the stage for good. Hail, Flipper.




Pop-O-Pies - In Frisco. This is a reunion clip. The original song resides in record collections only and it's a true mess. But a glorious one. I remember the first time I heard this because nobody was supposed to call it "Frisco." That was considered tourist word usage only. Joe Pop-O-Pie was all about appropriating lingo to his own ends, dripping with deadpan irony. Ah, youth.

Monday, November 18, 2013

Rivendell Bike Book & Hatchet - Walnut Creek's Weirdest Store

It says so right on the sign.


A little context: Rivendell Bicycle Works is a unique company, making steel-frame bikes with tender loving care since 1994. Rivendell has always worked on old-fashioned principles of communication and hand-crafting and as such, the owner, Grant Petersen, has been writing his own newsletter since the company formed. If I were to summarize his bicycle philosophy, I would say: ride a bike like when you were a kid. Have fun, be comfortable, ride with friends, put stuff in your bike basket and head out.

Rivendell Bike Book & Hatchet is Rivendell's new store in downtown Walnut Creek that displays their bikes, has a wonderful selection of classic children's literature (including Edward Lear's A Book of Nonsense—a must-have), and hatchets—a wall of them. And you can split some wood at the store so you're assured of buying the right hatchet for your household.



All around the store hang these little signs, made of wood and twine, written with what must be a wood-burning kit, like you got for Christmas in 1974. This sign is in the front window and reads: average daily sales for the first 20 days of operations were, like, about $352...which, of course, isn't exactly sustainable—but, you know, things will, pick up as we get closer to hatchet season—which runs from Thanksgiving to Father's Day, which you know, generally arrives mid-June.


This is probably my favorite store sign of all time. It's so honest and straight-forward and optimistic.

Jackson models next to Rivendell's antique typewriter. You can type out suggestions on index cards and post them to the bulletin board, which promises to answer all suggestions—eventually.


I confidently stepped up to the typewriter to compliment the store on its book selection and to suggest some Jane Austen in the future. I learned on a typewriter much like this, so I had no fear. But this typewriter was a doozy. I had to really punch those keys. I ended up index-fingering it, like a newspaper reporter in a pre-code movie. But I managed to get through it and it was a satisfying form of communication.

So what can we take away from this shopping experience? Well, everyone at Rivendell is really, really nice. They gave Jackson a fine Frisbee that is now one of our favorites. They tried not to charge Keith for some IVO lip balm, but Keith insisted on paying. Maybe they felt bad about running out of pine tar soap. Grant thinks they might be the largest distributor of pine tar soap in the U.S. They're getting more—don't worry.

Anyway, shopping should be personable, fun, and sometimes weird, and this store covers all its bases nicely. And the books are great. I hope they get a bigger selection, because any store that promotes Robert McCloskey's Blueberries for Sal wholeheartedly is a good neighborhood store indeed.

Rivendell also has a bike showroom in Walnut Creek and you can test-ride bikes there. The new Bike Book & Hatchet is throwing a Grand Opening celebration December 14th: details. This very pleasant video introduces the people who make up Rivendell.



Disclosure: we've known Grant for a long time, though we really need to see more of him. I'm glad his presence has made its way downtown. Grant's Blog.

Sunday, November 03, 2013

Random Image Post with Random Ramblings

I was tidying up today. Got rid of a ton of bulky clothes, file folders full of old property deeds and all sorts of this-and-that. One folder was labeled: Fancy Paper, and it was full of just that: handmade papers, containing pulp, flecks, leaves and string. It symbolized so much of what I choose to keep, give away, or toss. I kept the fancy paper, but the old tax records—they will go (in five years).

I cleaned up my digital files as well and here's some random images I came upon. I'm keeping all this, you betcha. Commentary is strictly off the top of my head. Anyone looking for images: this is what I call my "SEO stew."

Does anyone remember the 1970 Sid and Marty Krofft show The Bugaloos? It's pretty awful. These British fairy-folk and their ugly little pal, Sparky with a light-up butt, live in a Tranquility Forest, playing in their power-pop band while teaching lessons about sharing and not being afraid and tripping as hard as is humanly possible. 

A touching scene from The Bugaloos
And now the theme song will be stuck in your head for all of eternity:




Flower power to the MAX.




What else? Recently I read Lawrence Wright's dread-inducing expose, Going Clear - Scientology, Hollywood, & The Prison of Belief. Oh my God—madness, manipulation, mind control. Plus beat-downs, extortion, bullshit, and much about this entitled, unofficial spokesperson:

Gaaah!
This image, from a leaked Scientology-produced interview, is so terrifying to me—like someone possessed in a Stephen King book. Doesn't Tom Cruise look like he wants to eat you? And chew on your soul for a while, like it's a piece of soul jerky. And then afterward pick his teeth with a gold toothpick manufactured by hundreds of Scientologist children, who labored in the high desert mountains for years, panning and digging and trawling for minerals, only seeing their Sea Org-bound parents twice a year, and for only a few minutes at a time, while inexperienced minions barely watched over them, having signed billion-year contracts to...

Oh, Jesus. Just read the book. It's truly horrible what this "religion" does to its followers.



And while you're at it, see The Master, which won't admit it's about that schizophrenic-spectrum sociopath, L. Ron Hubbard, but it is.




Ahh, look at Dinosaur Jr., before they were Dinosaur Jr. They started out in 1985 as Dinosaur, but this band of old musical farts from San Francisco, called The Dinosaurs, threatened to sue these three young fellows from Massachusetts over name infringement.

So they changed their name and were thoroughly great and a big influence on grunge, a few years down the road. J Mascis played guitar like he was channeling every radio hit from the '70s into one lunatic sonic boom featuring the ultimate in blistering guitar solos. He called it psychedelic country. Good deal.






Look, the Jackson 5. I loved the Jackson 5 so much when I was a kid. They brought great musical joy into my life. Michael was so phenomenal. His dad told everyone he was eight years old when he was really eleven, just to make him seem that much more amazing, but that was unnecessary (and unethical). We could all see and hear how amazing he was. The amount of hours and yes, misery, it must have taken to get the Jackson kids to this level of professionalism cannot be underestimated. I mean, I can't get my kid to watch The Iron Giant with me, though I know he'd love it. Perhaps growing up in a tiny house in Gary, Indiana is its own motivation.





Do you know how many hours my friends and I spent doing The Robot to this song? Untold hours.



Have we reached maximum SPIROMANIA yet?

Hell yeah, Spirograph

OK, one more. Now that I've cleaned up a little around here, it's time for some light dusting and vacuuming. I like to look my best while I clean house, because then I feel at my best. And that's what counts.


Thursday, October 31, 2013

Halloween is a Sexy Pumpkin Costume Time

Of all the U.S. holidays, Halloween has shown the most growth in terms of overall market share. Nobody even knows why we celebrate Halloween any more, unless you happen to be a scholar of 16th-century Gaelic Pagan festivals. We just want to bring on the sexy!

So whether you're dressed as a sexy caterpillar,


a sexy penguin,


a sexy squid,


a sexy elephant,


or a sexy hamster wearing sexy sportswear...



...because nothing implies sexy like a hamster—have a glorious all hallows eve, you sexy, sexy pumpkin. And don't forget your Popeye-like foofy legwarmer accessories. They make the costume!


Hey there, sexy pumpkin lady

Thursday, October 24, 2013

First Female Sasquatch Sighted - Photos

Every time someone spies a Bigfoot, we all just assume it's a GUY. These photos beg to differ! Large, hirsute and fashionably attired, this lady Sasquatch is ready for a night out in the forest.



Female Bigfoot's stiletto heel-print is further proof that she is stylin' from head to toe.


Thursday, October 17, 2013

Movies You May Have Missed - Baadasssss! (2003)

When taking into account labors of love, Mario Van Peebles' Baadasssss! ranks high. No one is as uniquely qualified to make a movie about his father, Melvin Van Peebles' story of going to hell and back to make his groundbreaking independent film Sweet Sweetback's Baadasssss Song. Mario, as a teen, played young Sweetback in his dad's film. In Baadasssss!, he portrays his father, and his relationship with his intense, artistic dad is woven throughout the Homeric odyssey that was Sweetback. Mind-fuck!

Melvin Van Peebles is a director, writer, composer and visual artist, who once conducted cable cars in San Francisco. All of these jobs require focus and drive. Now 81 years old, he is still not messing around. He fronts his own band, and is currently headlining his first art show in New York.

Melvin had directed his first studio feature, Watermelon Man in 1970, and rather than continue making more comedies for mass consumption ("How about 'Fried Chicken Man'?" suggests his agent in Baadasssss!), Van Peebles wrote a movie he wanted to not only make, but see. Disgusted by the derogatory African American stereotypes Hollywood had been churning out for decades, 1970 was the perfect time for his cinematic vision. War, assassinations, systematic oppression—people were fed up and tired of feeling that way. Van Peebles' artistic antennae were out, taking it all in. Hollywood, typically, was ten years behind the times.

Sweetback would never be funded by the studio system. It would have to be independent (with the help of a last-minute Hail Mary $50,000 loan from Bill Cosby). When it was released, only two U.S. theaters would initially show it. No papers would accept advertisements for it due to an X rating. Melvin composed all the music for the film (with then-unknown Earth, Wind & Fire, who were living in a one-room apartment at the time), and pre-released a soundtrack album as an unprecedented marketing promotion. Huey P. Newton would end up endorsing the film as revolutionary and it became required viewing for new Black Panther recruits. It became the highest grossest independent film of all time and ushered in an era of black action heroes, embraced by the paying movie public.

All film students, if they're attending a decent school, learn of Sweetback because it really did help change the face and business of cinema forever. It ushered in (for better or worse) the popular studio-run blaxploitation genre, And would open the door for more gritty "naturalistic" films directed by mavericks who wanted to tell stories from the street level, including Spike Lee, who is quoted as saying, "Sweet Sweetback's Baadasssss Song gave us all the answers we needed. This was an example of how to make a film (a real movie), distribute it yourself, and most important, get paid."

Sweetback is as much a sound collage and visual montage, as a portrait of a man on a surreal run from corrupt Johnny Law. The title character, (played by Melvin because he couldn't use union hires or find experienced actors who would settle for only six lines of dialogue), as an orphan growing up in a brothel, uses sex rather than violence as his power. (The very graphic sex scenes ironically kept my film professors from screening the film in class.) Sweetback becomes a folk hero who's running through a nightmare of jarring jump cuts, multiple exposures, disjointed musical and sound cues, frame-within-frame shots, and all manner of strange angles and pistol-whipping mayhem to portray the nightmare of corruption and racism on the streets. It's poetry, jazz riff, gospel choir, and peep show in one, and for the first time in film history at that time, he gets away. He is the hero.

Baadasssss! is the re-enactment of the making Sweetback, as well as a boy-bonds-with-his-father story. But there's another great component: the  trauma and heartbreak of creating a film from start to finish. Have you ever wondered what it would be like to go into labor and bring forth new life? The closest thing I can compare it to is working on a low-budget feature. And after the birth, you're not done! There's still distribution and the hope of regaining some of your money back. Your work is never done, raising children, or in filmmaking.

And now:



Mario as Melvin with his ever-present cigar. He looks a lot like his dad, and intercuts actual footage from Sweetback in clever ways for more authenticity. His father's only directive before production, "Don't make me too nice." Mario concurred, portraying his dad as a charismatic, driven, difficult, stubborn, frightening, intense and draining man. Funding this biopic was no doubt a difficult task.



Melvin writes his screenplay. I'm working on a screenplay now and my brain feels just like this. How do you make the act of writing cinematic? With a days-long montage and a stroll into a mirror of neighborhood characters—one of the few effects shots, perhaps in honor of Melvin's many effects shots in Sweetback.



Ladies and gentlemen, the 70s. This was a low-budget independent film, like its predecessor—not an easy thing for a period production. Good set design lets you thoroughly know where you are in time and place.



Rainn Philips as Bill, the hippie who wants to be an executive producer. He adds the element of goofiness in every scene, including his attempts at finding financial backing through the counter-culture.



Look at these guys. The guy on the right's definitely on MDMA and wants to finance a movie that will "change human consciousness not only horizontally but vertically" (I paraphrase). His lawyer on the left looks like Night Stalker killer Richard Ramirez. The romance of producing a film definitely ends here.



One of Melvin's directives for Sweetback is to include the people he grew up with, from Chicago's South Side, to South Central L.A. "All the people Norman Rockwell never painted."



Another crucial element - a crew that would reflect the diversity of the U.S. Not only were the studio bosses solidly white but so were the unions. Most of his crew would be new to filmmaking and working under the radar to avoid union fines. They pretended to be making a porn film, which wasn't union mandated—truly underground, guerrilla cinema.



Casting call - young Mario (Klheo Thomas) is taking it all in on the counter-top right. His dad would cast him as young Sweetback, placing him in the raw opening scene, losing his virginity with a prostitute. For Sweetback, sex is his power (as much power a poor, silent-man-running can have). But I can't imagine Mario at 14 felt powerful making that scene. Thomas, a very good child actor, has a talent for projecting his inner emotional world, whether he has dialogue or not.



Melvin confronts his alter-ego—his own self-doubt, before shooting without sufficient funds. Over the course of the production he will lose almost everything, his savings, his family, his sight. But somehow never his drive and vision. A genius-or-madman situation.



Anyone who doubts Melvin's artistry—look at his title. Only an artist could come up with such a name. Yet he made all his money back and then some. Rare.



Baadasssss! has a brilliantly edited scene of Sweetback's opening night in Detroit. Melvin, in his DVD interview, likens it to "two-legged horse race." The agony and ecstasy of seeing your art on the big screen while praying to some unheeding God that someone will show up to see your work is all encapsulated here.



According to Melvin, he stood clear so Mario could tell the story his own way. Most fathers would have a hard time doing that and it's a form of collaboration, in a way.

Melvin Van Peebles

Baadasssss! trailer (with *sigh* white narrator)




Sweet Sweetback's Baadasssss Song trailer